As we hurtle headlong towards our second holiday season without Alicia, I am finding myself losing little memory bits of her such as her scent. Memory is such a fickle thing. I will never forget Alicia as she will always be a part of me, & our family. Yet memories will slip away like leaves from a tree. Slowly... but steadily until we are left with the essence of who she is. I want to forestall this slow erosion. How? Maybe I should spend a day in remembrance of Alicia..who she was...what she believed in....etc. To this day, I still feel the urge to cry when I speak of her. Last week I was chatting with a new employee who played semi-pro soccer as a left mid-fielder and I recalled memories of Alicia paying with the MYSL Panthers in that same position. When asked is she playing today that unfortunately she is not and that she had died. I felt my eyes fill with tears but I did not want this person to feel uncomfortable so I choked back what I could and let the few tears run their course. To turn 'on & off' these emotions is probably unrealistic but I need to be cautious with the surroundings.
During a TEAM car wash last week, I met a Burke's alumni parent who now has a kid in TEAM and lives in Corte Madera. She reminded me that if it not for Alicia, she would have never heard of the TEAM program. She also thanked me again for helping her with the paperwork and logistics when starting up a select soccer team with Jose Caballero for her kid. I felt touched that she would remember that since it would have been over 8 years ago. I guess that demonstrates that we all leave impressions behind.
