Year 2, 24Jun12

It's hard to fathom that Alicia's 20th birthday is right around the corner. I am torn by that fact. On one hand, I can hardly believe that it has been 20 years since she was born. We were living in North Beach in San Francisco at the time. Cathie's water broke overnight which was a slight inconvenience but none the less, she went back to sleep. When I awoke that morning and she relayed that fact, off we went to the hospital. Cathie's labor was rapid thus not allowing time for an epidural to be set...au natural Alicia came. On the other hand, she has not aged a day beyond 17 in my mind. I can only wonder how she would have continued to mature...with life...with university...with everything. She was a very light and playful person as evidenced by her self portrait above.

Year 2, 13Jun12

Saturday we returned my dad's ashes to the earth/sea. It had been just over 2 years since he had died. It has taken us this long to come to grips with what happened in 2010 such that we were able to proceed with his final wishes. It was a beautiful day. Jim came with us and performed our last act as sons for him. What has helped me is something Cathie told me a while ago. These ashes are not the person. Their spirit and they themselves had already left. These were just the remains. We still have Alicia's ashes... We would like to scatter the ashes at places which had a significant impact on her life. Places where she discovered herself and her love of the outdoors. I read a story in the San Jose Mercury about a 4 year old girl, Amy Wang who recently died due to complications of Fanconi's anemia. It was heartbreaking. It is well worth the read. 'Coming home'.