Year 1, 15Jan12

I did something over the holidays I thought I would never do. When asked about how many children did we have, I said 'one'. Immediately, I sensed it was wrong but I did not correct myself. I felt it would have been more awkward correcting myself at the time. What would have been awkward is this occurred at our company holiday party and I was speaking with the head of western regional sales and his wife. This has been on my mind since it occurred. Why did I do it? Should the situation have played into my thinking? Later that evening, Cathie emphatically and poignantly asked me why it did it. I have tried to stay true to myself and Alicia but for some reason, I let this slip. At all other times, I have stated we 'had' two children with one still with us. Then when asked, I would explain Alicia had died. I have tried to speak with him to clear my conscious, but he has not been in the office when I have walked by.