I can not believe it has been almost 6 months since Alicia’s death. For me, this has been like living in a parallel universe. One from which we can never return. I remember what life was like before I switched universes... what life was like with the four of us. While we were not “the Cleavers”, we did OK. We had our ‘ups and downs’ as families do but we had each other. I long for those days. Now I can only remember what life was like and hypothesize what life may have been.
We have all changed for good, bad, or indifferent. Yet our pain and sorrow is still fresh. Cathie had set her sights on becoming a member of Marin Search and Rescue which she recently achieved with hard work and determination. Cathie and I have taken up tennis a couple of nights a week. This is a sport Cathie had wanted for our family to take up for years which we never did. I have seen more movies in theaters that I have in the past 2 to 3 years. Cathie and Jasmine had always been big movie goers. We have attended more art events along those same lines. I guess Alicia’s death has pushed me to live for today. Enjoy things while I am able and do not take the small things for granted.
I sense Jasmine is headed for a cross roads. She is your typical teenage angst riddled insecure girl. When Alicia died, she lost a huge pillar of support. Someone she can speak to in confidence who had shared experiences growing up together. This past summer, Jasmine spent a significant portion of it away form home by her design. Now that school has begun, she maybe feeling disoriented. Most of Alicia’s friends have gone off to college with the rest going shortly. These friends have been the source of significant support for her. They have helped ease her transition but now are on the verge of leaving. She will once again have to find her way. I think it maybe of some help to get her into a peer support group setting.
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