Before we leave Alicia's 19th BDay month, I took a stroll down memory lane my You Tube site. I watched the picture montage I collated last month, and a few of the video clips from her memorial. As I watched, I felt as if it were only last month. The emotions are still churning just under the surface. All it takes is a small fissure through which they all rush out into the light of day. At these times, I am laid open for the world to see. To share in my sorrows...my tears... these memories. I find my self at times having to retell her story. I am able to struggle thought it.
Still Alicia's room stands as a memorial to her. Her TEAM acceptance letter still on her tack board. Her thoughts and struggles with which college to attend. Her fancy shoes she only wore once or twice are still there. I go into her room to remember when I feel the need and peruse her belongings...my memories. What will we do with Alicia's things? Her soccer trophys...clothes...furniture...books... I guess the time will come when it feels right. Until then, time stand still her her room.
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