We spent this afternoon with a friend who's daughter attended school and played soccer with Alicia. It was a sunny but windy day on the bay. The last time I had sailed was with the same friend about 8+ years ago with Alicia. It was another sunny day on the bay. I recall sitting back thinking this was almost perfect. So sailing had a little edge to it emotionally for me.
This evening, we went to see Toy Story 3 in 3D. I had met the film's editor in Germany on our way home from Paris. The whole Andy college thing snuck upon us. The scene where his mom walks into a nearly bare room and broke down with memories started the emotional flood gates. Of all things, to sit in a nearly empty theater crying at a cartoon movie. This was a scene we would have loved to have experienced but it will be another 5 years.
We went to the movie in lieu of seeing fireworks at the Marin County fair. As a family, we had gone to watch the fireworks the past 2 years in the same spot from above the fairgrounds. This year without Jasmine, we decided not to go. The thought of watching again from spot from which we watched the past 2 years was a little much.
On Friday a good friend who I had met via The Compassionate Friends (TCF) shared with me his special place. The spot was set amongst a outcropping of trees over looking a reservoir. He had setup a beautiful area to read, write, and bask in her memory. The hike was beautiful and the intention was genuine. As we sat, we shared stories and moments about our daughters.
Alicia's friends are still posting on her F'book page. There are some amazing yet totally gut retching as well.
Five more days until her 18th bday. We are likely to keep it low key. Exactly what eludes us at this time.
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