Well...today I walked down to T-valley beach, hiked up to the bunker, then climbed all the way to the top. The view was spectacular from up there. I can see why Alicia must have liked coming there especially to see the stars. But boy, it is a ways up there. It was a beautiful day today. Sunny and not too warm. I set out new oranges and placed new flowers at the bunker. I cleaned up the older flower remains.
Why do I keep going down there? I keep telling myself that this is the last place Alicia was seen alive. It sounds right and possibly even feels OK. But I'm not 100% sure. Is there some spiritual pull? It may be my way to keeping her alive in my mind and spirit. Being in the outdoors, hiking near the ocean all of which she loved.
I do miss her terribly. I may not break down and cry but my soul yearns to hear her vocie. There are still things that make my eyes fill with tears. Like dropping off Jasmine today at vall carpool... I vividly recall doing the same with Alicia many times. I remember she hated me talking with her about how she played at tournaments etc. Folding some of her clothes that Jasmine now wears. Talking to AT&T about her cell phone. etc. I can go on and on and on. Alicia is an amazing kid. We all loved her very much. This is very very hard.
Looks like her primary school , Katherine DeMar Burkes is going to dedicate a bench on her behalf. Alicia loved Burkes. They do an excpetional job developing strong women. She was close to her class.
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